Paws Off!

Something that really rubs me the wrong way (sometimes literally) is when people touch my hair. Strangers actually come up and stroke my hair from behind. Call me crazy, but I have a problem with it. I get it, not a lot of people have hair like me, but that doesn't equal an invitation to come up and pet me! It's hair rape and I don't appreciate it.

I love my hair. It's got character and I think it suits my personality. It's even earned me the nickname "Fluffy" among my teammates. I really don't mind if people I know ask to touch my hair, even if it does get a bit tedious. I guess I know how celebrities feel signing autographs everywhere they go.

But whenever I go to the arena to watch my brother play hockey, I'm assaulted by a squadron of hockey moms, swooping down on me like a bunch of ravenous turkey vultures.
Mom A: "Doesn't she have beautiful hair?!"
Mom B: "Why yes, she does! It's just so beautiful!"
Mom C: "Oh, I wish I had beautiful hair like that!"
Mom D: "She's so lucky to have hair so beautiful!"  (at this point, a scarf to cover my head is looking pretty beautiful to me)
Mom A: "I bet it's soft..."
Mom B: "Can we touch it?"
Mom C: "Oh yes, can we please?!"
Mom D doesn't even wait for me to respond before swinging her mittened paws at my head. I have known those ladies for over ten years, and most of them still refer to me as "Kurt's sister, the girl with the hair!" At least at the arena I have a good excuse to wear a hat, but sometimes they actually make me take it off to see my hair.

However, they aren't as bad as when I go out in public and some loaded, high, or socially awkward person decides that I'm obviously not a real person, just an amazingly lifelike animatronic that is there purely for their enjoyment, and they pet me. I really don't understand why some people don't get that it's socially unacceptable to stroke a stranger!

Do these come in people sizes?

Go ahead and admire-from afar. Gawk! Heck, point of you like, just please, PLEASE ask before you touch, and only if you actually know me. :)
(Seriously, it scares the bejeezus out of me when people don't.)